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Amplified Life Counseling & Coaching
  • About Us
    • Our Therapists
    • Sabreen Polavin, LMSW
    • Katie Reichard, LMSW
    • Nick VanZalen, LPC
    • Aren Lord, LMSW
    • Naomi Grimm, LLPC
    • Nate Apel, LLPC
    • Mike Wiersma, LPC
    • Chris VanStee, LLPC
    • Caitlin Terize, LMSW
    • Susan Labardee, Wellbeing Coach
    • Lyle Labardee, MS, LPC | EAP Consultant
    • What Sets Us Apart
    • Community Connections
    • Join Our Team
    • Notice of Privacy Practices
    • Contact Us
  • Insurance Accepted
  • Individuals & Families
    • We Also Offer
    • MindBody Fitness Program
    • Relationship Guidance for Women
    • Gottman Marriage Workshop
    • We Help With
    • Adjustment Disorder
    • Anxiety
    • ASD
    • Bipolar Disorder
    • Borderline Personality Disorder
    • Childhood Behavioral Disorders
    • Depression
    • CPTSD
    • Grief & Loss
    • PTSD
    • Relational Distress
    • Situational Stress
    • Substance Use Disorder
    • Eating Disorders
    • We Use
    • Acceptance & Commitment Therapy
    • Child Therapy
    • Christian Counseling
    • CISM
    • Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
    • Couples Counseling
    • Dialectical Behavior Therapy
    • Enneagram Assessment
    • EMDR
    • Family Therapy
    • Grief Counseling
    • Internal Family Systems
    • Life Coaching
    • Men's Counseling
    • Solution Focused Therapy
    • Substance Use Counseling
    • Women's Counseling
  • Employers & Organizations
  • Wellbeing Resources
    • Blogs
    • Marriage Matters
    • Child & Youth Guidance
    • Workplace Wellbeing
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Positive Parenting

Parenting doesn’t need to be a war between you and your child. Effective discipline is proactive, and it encourages positive actions and personal responsibility. It promotes your child’s self-esteem and strengthens relationships between you, your child and their siblings.

WHY CHILDREN MISBEHAVE

Kids truly do mean well and do their best to behave. Sometimes they will fall short of our behavioral expectations. There are several factors contributing to both your child’s behavior and your reaction. 

Consider the following:

  • What is the specific behavior?
  • How do you feel about it?
  • What is your personality type? Your child’s?
  • Why do you think they’re behaving this way?
  • Where is the behavior occurring? Who is there,when it happens?
  • Is  anything  impacting  or  preventing  your response to it?

ACTION STEPS

Positive  discipline  trains  children  to  behave without resorting to bribes, threats, yelling, or even physical actions. The following strategies will help you channel your child’s energy (and yours) into a more desirable outcome:

 ✓  Refrain from saying “no” – There’s something about being told “no” that makes children (or adults) want to do something all the more. Instead, offer an alternative.

✓ Control  yourself  –  Children  watch  their parents. You’re modeling for them what is acceptable. If you yell, they will also. Take steps to remain calm and keep the situation from escalating.

✓ Consistency – We sometimes overlook or address behaviors based on the situation and our own energy level. This can confuse a child. Be clear and consistent with expectations.

✓ Good behavior counts – Too often we give our kids more attention when they misbehave. When we choose to ignore negative behaviors and highlight a good behavior instead, we show our kids what we truly value.

✓ Avoid bribery – When we offer our children bribes as incentives, they don’t associate good behavior as the reward itself. Help your child see that good behavior and choices bring their own rewards.

✓ Give options – There’s nothing wrong with giving your child choices. For example, if a child is fighting with their sibling, explain to them you only have enough energy to either listen to their squabble or do something fun later.

✓ Rewards   –  Incentives  can  be  powerful motivators for positive behavior.

✓  Responsibility – Trusting children to take care of certain tasks should be seen as a privilege. Responsibility is a reward in itself. When it is framed this way, children will naturally desire to behave in a positive manner to gain more responsibilities.

✓ Your attention – Giving a child your love, understanding  and  attention  is  the  best reward for them. Setting aside time every day to spend with your child is the best way to influence their lives.

KEEP IN MIND

Raising healthy, well-behaved children takes time,  consistency  and  patience.  Long-term habits in anyone’s life require time, and children are no exception. The best results are not always immediate. Stick with it and continue reinforcing your commitment, and remember a licensed counselor or therapist can help you explore how to implement these methods. Loving your child is always a worthwhile investment with life-long returns.

Want to talk to a counselor today about this? 

Call us at 800-453-7733 and ask for your “Free 15 Minute Phone Consultation" with one of our licensed counselors. We’ll listen, answer questions you may have, and help you plan next steps.

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Lyle Labardee, MS, LPC is a licensed behavioral health therapist and former first responder who specializes in first responder wellness. He also serves as CEO of Amplified Life, a leading provider of counseling, coaching, consulting and critical incident response services. Amplified Life stands ready to support you in the very important work you do. Please feel free to contact us at any time as needed by calling or emailing our Care Team at 616-499-4711 | care@amplife.us.

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7791 Byron Center Ave SW
Byron Center, MI 49315
616-499-4711


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2465 Byron Station Dr SW
Byron Center, MI 49315
616-499-4711

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